Satisfactory ;

Going back to NS

2012-01-26T03:10:00.001+08:00

Lol seriously I hate using the initials NS already makes me sad err hahah okay never mind.

Firrrrstly! Happy Chinese New Year! :D You may also call it eating festival -.-
And this is like the best damn hamper ever.

Okay moving on, came back few days from NS for the CNY holidays, leaving... In a few hours time lol. I was so lazy. Actually busy lor k. Busy sleeping and busy eating.

Well I treasure every single time I use my own bathroom to bathe, sleep on my comfy cosy hard-to-detach bed, clean clear water and fantastic food with amazing people. AND NOW FAT UNTIL!!!!!!!!!!!! zz

Erherm moving on. Again. I'm just really happy, that joy inside when you sit with your family in a table and you have to squeeze to fit everyone for a marvelous new year dinner :*)

AND THEN THE MOST AMAZING PART IS.......................

YES YES YESSSSSSSSSS!!! WATCH SAM AND DEAN WINCHESTER WORKING TOGETHER WITH CASTIEL KILLING BLACK-EYED SONS OF BITCHES so they call'em AND PULLING LUCIFER DOWN THE HOLE!!!!!

My season 6 is still downloading lol after NS come back watch :D:D:D:D

Okay and then today! Which is Wednesday! Woke up at 11 so early I can't even... Sigh. But for the sake of my good ol' friends. Went to Sunway Pyramid to meet up and crap all around. From lunch to walking aimlessly to singing the birthday song to 'Adam' once the elevator door opens. Great times indeed :)
Very unfortunately my eyes were so small today -__- OKOKOK!! I'm not saying it's usually big, it's always small, just that today smallest so calm yo tids.

PURPOSELY SQUINT ONE OK!!

Camp-mate!

Yeah we all agree Daniel is so ugly.

So not stating the obvious.

So focus lol.

Beloved! ✿

OK BYE.

OH. HI JERICA. STUPID WHORE IF YOU DON'T MISS ME AND I CERTAINLY WILL MISS YOU I AM GONNA MAKE YOWEY DISAPPEAR!! I love you ok. :)

Bye Alyssaaaaaaaaaa hehehhehehe :) I'm gonna miss you.

Oh right Alyssa called just now due to some hot and spicy issue lol we laughed and laughed BUT YOU SEE, I AM CRYING SO HARD INSIDE I AM ABOUT TO DIE LOL NO SERIOUSLY I wanna kill myself for taking this thing so serious it's not even something that has to do with me stupid whore mess with my feelings I hate myself even more thanks for nothing!!

Alright the end bye pray I enjoy NS ok! :)

December 2011

2012-01-01T05:38:00.000+08:00

So...... Happy new year. Not exactly happy but, that's what everyone says.
I just can't believe 1st of January is here.

I am going to report myself for National Service later I have to reach there at 8.30am and now looking at the clock 4.55am. Great. I seriously want to cry but I can't, because tearing makes the eyes tired and I must wake up later so crying would be a problem lol.

Well here's a little (hardly) about December.
Okay firstly the pictures I uploaded here is just random picks from thumbnails that I like so don't go all "NOUUUUUU Y EMIN NO POST BOUT ME I HATE HER" ok because if you act like that I will hate you, and also of course not because I am too lazy to actually look at pictures and choose them, I am totally not like that please. And the pictures are so not in order it's not because I'm lazy okay get over it.

Keep your opinions to yourself :)

Last day of SPM, taken by Miss Shirlena!

Lol doesn't seem like it but I really love JiaXi. A lot. Period.

Do not judge me by the way I treat her :D

Alyssa and me at TTC's SPM Party. I just really love this photo.

Class trip, like the best fucking one.

3 of us :,)

Prom. Us whores whoring like no whore's business.

My 9 years BFF :) OH WAIT since it's 2012 already make it 10! :,)

Ming Hong! :) Ok it's 5.09 now because while I was typing this Minghong called LOL coincidence or not so nice of him seriously.

LOL this is definitely one important photo. Evidence of 3 of us bitching about a b... I mean a girl.

Thank God me and Jerica's faces were covered haha I think we were probably imitating her!

BRI! Well we did that face on purpose lol I don't even know why.

The mango tastes good haha!

Love love love!

I HAVE THIS SIDE OF ME SO YOU SHOULD BE SCARED no like, seriously,

be scared.

BILLY!! I like him, he is a true good Samaritan I swear. Everybody in class loves him!

Such a lohmantis photo :D With Miyi beebee!

4 of us on bed camwhoring while others were outside busy doing their stuff :D

LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, eternally seriously one.

Electroerz, not a perfect photo but it's the best. THEEEEEE best.

Ok this is the only photo of everyone with their feet above the ground maybe NOT entirely but it sure looks that way! Haha I love my class so much.

Hi again.

I have so many things to say lol I'm not even kidding but I have very little time right now.
I've tried my best to be living positively everyday, I may be sad or cry and had bad days, but who doesn't have them? I just, maybe I didn't work hard enough (BUT I WORKED VERY HARD OK JUST MAYBE NOT ENOUGH LOR) for my studies but I think I live tough enough this year and that's like my every year's resolution. Personally I think new year resolutions are crap. I've made them before, yes it's a target but it's actually also an obstacle, I don't really know how to explain (lol when do I actually) but it is. Because you keep wanting to achieve it or do it you restrict yourself from doing things you actually should do you know? And because actually I think the more you think about those kind of stuff you wanna accomplish or complete or do, it's kinda hard for you to actually do it. And when you just let things be and do what you should then maybe you can complete it. I don't know what example to give you but it just works that way. Like maybe you wanna forget someone, because you think of it as a need for you to do it. Then you ask yourself to must forget and constantly reminding yourself that okay maybe by that time I will forget about stuff that happened but I think it's actually doing the total opposite. Because you keep that in your mind so you won't forget you know? Don't think about it too much and focus on happy happy things :') Lol honestly I don't care if it's a lousy example I just typed what I typed so you shouldn't judge please thanks.

ANYWAYZ, so much for crapping seriously. I'm gonna miss everyone, like, everyone. Even people I dislike you know, because they made me pass time by thinking about why I dislike them lol thank you. Of course I'm excited, it's 3 months, I wanna experience something new and have fun. But I'm scared, so so afraid at the same time. You don't understand the way our uncivilized strangers that live in the same country thinks/work. Heck I'm scared to be bullied or things get stolen or even worse... Ok don't go there. I just wanna come home safe and sound, and of course happy.

How much I'm gonna miss my girls, my boys.
CUTE LITTLE XIN-NING EELYNN SOOKMIN QUINCE ALYSSA JIAXI MIYI AND MY BELOVED WAIYEN SO MANYOTHERS :((((((
JERICA LOL JERICA YES THAT WHORE I'M GON' MISS HER SO MUCH.
And my precious little Bryan.So worried about him seriously lol so sad. Hope no one bullies him at school because if anyone does they're gonna get it from me.

I'm out. See you after 3 months. I wonder what's gonna happen.

2 days before prom.

2011-12-17T23:00:00.002+08:00

Just came back from the class trip yesterday and I am so damn tired still, I MISS IT SO MUCH.

but.

I am going to put my nostalgia aside first and.

My current situation is, my face is having an acne disaster so horrifying I JUST CAN'T. I wanna cry looking at my face it's never been so horrible I swear and prom is on Monday!!!! Fuck my life. And my arms are so fat and huge I JUST CAN'T. And then I don't have a room in the hotel and they expect me to be there at 8 in the morning for rehearsal and another rehearsal is at 3pm to 5pm?

LIKE ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS BRO?????

I am so enraged not because I have a problem with the arrangement, NO WAIT ACTUALLY, THE WHOLE PROBLEM IS THE ARRANGEMENT. Okay let's say from 8am we rehearse until 10am then maybe I can leave then come back again for the afternoon one but then it's so far so tell me when should I fucking do my hair and make up and all that shit? Some more prom is at 7pm. URGHHHHHH. And then no room provided I WANNA CRY AND DIE. Do you know how 麻烦 is it or not? Why did the department in charge even arrange the time like this?????

I asked like the whole world to share a room but it's either I'm not close with them they probably won't like it since I'm gonna be there THE WHOLE DAY or, they have people who mind. Omggggggg cry.

Then I have no heels to match my dress, let's just say I have no heels lol I fail being a girl.

Then!!! I have a friend I wanted to borrow from she kinda ffk-ed me but not really because she had a really good reason - she didn't have a car available. And my mom is not willing to drive me to Puchong please and I have a facial appointment -__-

Then is my CD, my sister is driving me crazy because she is taking it all slow I wanna like, DIE. And I can't rush her why? BECAUSE SHE'S MA SISTER AND SHE'S DOING ME A FAVOR. Sob.

----EDIT-----
SO ACTUALLY IT'S NOT A VIDEO, A SMARTY PANTS TOLD ME IT IS ZZZZZZ, so, luckily :)

Then suddenly tell me I have to make a video about myself and the song I'm gonna sing. Really bro. I, I, I can't seriously I JUST CAN'T.

Then I have to worry about my eyesight because no one wears their glasses to prom some more I am performing. Good god I already have small eyes then I have poor eyesight I'd probably screw everything. Like maybe LOOKING UGLY, and oh, maybe TRIPPING ON STAGE.

Lol my life. I hate being a girl sometimes zzzzzz.

I like to rant so much I realize that you know.

An overrated friendship.

2011-12-07T16:53:00.000+08:00

YES SPM IS FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY YEAH FINALLY OVER OVER OVER, YEAH OVER.

Okay, berdasarkan tajuk di atas. I have decided to talk erm, type I mean? about A GIRL lol in case anyone thinks I'm gonna blog about guy stuff no I don't do that.
Since I don't know why out of nowhere today right before the Chinese paper 1 Alyssa just have the urge to ask "Eh you and Sze Xuann really hopeless already ah?"

Urgh why blogspot cannot connect twitter or facebook or something I wanna tag Alyssa lol so I don't have to purposely go find her and tell her.

Note that, all I am doing now is clarify and make things clear for my best friends who care so much about me ok I love you guys so much I can't even.

So, I am very sad (lol not really tho) to say that she is my former best friend in the whole wide world. See I so kind I bold and underline that word for you. The reason for being my former best friend not because I hate her or she's a bitch or she's prettier than me or she's richer than me or she's skinnier than me LOL BUT THEY ARE ALL TRUE 'cause I am so ugly seriously and I ain't even lying. But those are not the reasons la ok. I don't wanna be a bad person and talk entirely bad stuff about her 'cause if not people will come kill me lol no it's just because I'm a good person 8) Also note that I am a very good person and I am true to everyone ok :)

You know I cannot answer Alyssa's question because there is no answer like seriously. You would think that I choose not to talk to her or be friends with her is because I'm not over it or I'm still sad but the truth is I am very over it and I'm not sad about it anymore. But I hope she does lol so bad no la. You cannot blame me lor because she hurt me ma. I didn't say I was the bestest friend or whatever okay I just got really sad. Anyway, I choose not to re-communicate with her because if I do I feel like I'll risk my friendship with Eelynn and Sookmin. I don't wanna be afraid to loose them anymore. I am not blaming them for anything and maybe they won't be angry but I cannot take chances like this anymore. And they are the ones that stuck with me til the end. Oh and also because the way she talks to me now with all that emo guilty and sorry crap pisses me off. Why? Because she makes me feel guilty. Lol wtf I also hate myself 'cause I'm so fucking soft-hearted to people zzzzzz.

And some more hurt me so many times!! I cannot accept ok!!! Where got people like that one!!

Lol but cannot accept also must accept because it is the past, I'm fine now, and she proved to me that even the closest person can hurt you.
the closest hurts you the very fucking most to the core and at the fucking maximized maximum.
Yes that was how bad. No words to describe at all. Dude I was 14 what do you think my priority was? Planning the future to buy estate or houses and cars is it?

AND I must emphasis she did the same fucking thing for a few times ok I have to get hurt about the same thing for FEW fucking times. YOU TRY GET DUMPED FEW TIMES AND SEE. That's how I felt because she was like, erm, the totally understand me, talk on the phone from night til morning that kind of shit you know? The whole friendship was like, okay now I will treat you so nice then I'm gonna give you good memories and then oh I feel like leaving you already and continue to do that to other people. Okay I don't have to continue because this thing repeats on other people after me then back to me then to other people. People can don't understand me or don't like me because intimacy for me is very important I wanna be close with everybody because I like having friends lol I know at the same time I like to be anti-social. Well I keep things very much balanced.

It's so hard for me to forget a person's face or things they've done for me because those are the things I treasure. Once you did something nice for me instantly you can be my best friend. You did just that ONE thing I needed I can give you back a thousand times. Like seriously. Anyway again, I cannot accept I remember all the things you've done for me, then you do things to me like the good things you've done were just your fucking make-up or something. Then I come to a place where I hate everyone and I felt extra-extremely lonely. Because my friendship with Eelynn and Sookmin changed. And then Rouyi. And then Xiongyan.

I gave so many chances for myself to trust other people that can fulfill what she gave but she just had to take it ALL AWAY. People just never understand how much I loved Rouyi. And how much I loved Xiongyan. They never. Just like I said, you were there once, to me you were there forever and that's enough. I will never forget what I read from their blogs. And god, how much I miss them. I hope she doesn't, you know, because she doesn't deserve to. I don't care how well she treated them. She just doesn't. And I know I'm right.

Til now I will never forget what they have said to me, how they've said it to me. And the ways, really, the every way, they looked at me. Well I'm sure all of you won't know how low it got me lol and I'm not even kidding. Low self esteem, like maximum and I hate myself because I am forever not good enough. And after all of that, people still expect me to be friends with her which was totally absurd please.

Then the awkward times came when we grew older (lol yeah) and then we ignore this happened (tried so hard) but then that time I couldn't even bear staying in a room breathing the same air as her, felt as if she was ruining my life or something -__- But of course not la, that time I just haven't SEE OPEN yet. When she was there everyone would like leave me alone or ignore me okay maybe not, but forget me, yes. And I'll be like, 'Oh lord why am I here anyway. Hellooo? Victim here? And criminal there?' I tried talking to her, I can't. I will feel that I break my own principles. But until the time I got over it, I realize I don't even have to care because I don't have the need to talk to her. There are situations where confrontations are unnecessary one ok.

Putting thoooooose aside, I didn't forget the time when we were introduced (before we know each other), I only know she's Christine's best friend lol. I remember it like it was yesterday. It was one day when everyone was going into the hall to gather like every other day starting 12.30, then I was with Christine, she had to go to her place to take her bag at the canteen. And Szexuann was there alone taking her bag also. And cute little Christine was like "Eh Szexuann this is Emin and Emin this is Szexuann! She's my best friend!" Lol Christine was so cute I can't even, she always had a very short ponytail and tied very high just below the top of her head haha! Funny and cute, and she always does this thing with her mouth so cute and red blushy cheeks! I love her so much omg. Anyway after she introduced us Szexuann didn't react, I didn't know her, so I was like, 'Wah she so quiet one why Christine is friends with her'. Ahyah because Christine very noisy one la since primary school :p

Then things happened on Xiangqi's birthday celebration at pondok then we became best friends lol so funny I'd laugh at it now already -__- Well then we HAD so much in common so that's why I like her, she was just like me or something. She made me a really happy person in that mean time, I loved her so much. And she treated me well I guess. Everybody wanted a friend like that, so did I. I won't forget that, there will be great memories, but hey, they are memories after all. And the story goes on as above. I wouldn't wanna say what happened that made us grew apart because all I wanna do is treasure now. Just what sucks most is not her leaving me, is her leaving me when I already have no one, and my sisters and father... yeah never mind.

Yes I've thought of talking to her I'm fine now and I'm not lying really, but I'm not ready yet I think. Whateverthefuck are we gonna talk about? 'Hey how's life after hurting me?' That would be a nice start I know -.- Well.. She still makes me feel she has the tendency to climb on top of me again and takeover. All that while she was in control and no one, I repeat, NO ONE can control me anymore. Only I can restrict myself. I know what does limit mean.

Lol such an impact in my life right I know, but all thanks to her it's when I start to hate myself, hope you're proud lol. And also. Because she made me know self-realization and cautiousness. She was my lesson.

And now I have my prizeS already :D Everyone in my life has a special place in my heart. And you know what? I don't lie.

Loyalty, honesty, trustworthiness, harmony, peace, love, everything actually. I live by a lot of stuff. And I tolerate a lot of stuff. But I always know what KARMA means.

E.V. <3

Judgmental

2011-11-26T21:17:00.000+08:00

A lot has been going on for the last couple of months. Family, school. Well 'obstacles' pretty much sums the title of this month. You never know how evil, well no, I mean, like, unkind? when they are having problems.

You know I don't really believe when people say someone is two-faced.

Because they use it under the same circumstances.

1) That particular person is kind to you but on the other hand talks behind your back/gossips about you.

2) That particular person is faking it. Or simply just, fake.

Let me give you another example, irrelevant, but TOTALLY RELATED.

Situation : Amy's grandmother passed away, she is very sad, but she tries to keep it to herself. So Amy goes to school acting all normal like any other day, gossiping with her friends, laughing, having fun. Then suddenly she just lost it. She started crying so bad.

Reason : She was happy, normal as usual, but then she suddenly cries because she can't fake it anymore.

Problem : People thinks she's two-faced because she was fine at first, so everyone take it as it was because Amy was seeking for attention so she suddenly cries and start telling stories about how she misses her grandmother.

Maybe it wasn't a really good example but seriously it's a damn good example ok.

It's like,

at first you are friendly but then when you just don't feel like showing, you are two-faced.

Lol seriously bitches calm yo freakin restless minds.

EVERYBODY, I REPEAT, everyfuckingbody, is two-faced.

I can be happy now, I can be sad later. You don't need everyone to like you, understand you.

People always want other people to be in their shoes, so they can know what it feels like to be them.

So to the people who says that, have you tried being in other people's shoes before saying you want other people to be in your shoes? Which part of everybody has their own problems don't you understand?

Maybe after trying to be in another person's shoes you will feel better about yourself because you don't have to face their problems, and vice versa. Not everyone takes the same pain, accept the same problems. For example, you can like a guy with tattoos, well maybe other girls can't. Compare yourself with others all you want, I can't say anything about that because I do that myself too. But don't compare your problems with other people's problems. We handle things differently, our way of thinking is different.

Urgh. Actually what I wanna say is, DON'T JUDGE PEOPLE.

You don't like it when people criticize you, so you go and criticize other weaker people la is it?

Or, you can accept what other people think about you, you can ignore it, so you think everyone is as strong as you la is it? I get so mad when I know people like that.

Because everyone is 'judgey'. They judge as soon as they see a person.

And the truth is I think people judge people the most when they did something wrong, or when they're weak.

When you gave a first impression that you are strong, they expect you to be some serious strong lad. You know? But then when you show your vulnerable side, THE WHOLE THING CHANGES.

Sigh, I don't know how to explain how I feel. Sometimes I hate the human race, because we are created too smart. And we get outsmarted but ourselves. But on the other hand I love the human race. And in many ways I'm sure any human would understand.

OKAYYYYYYY, lol well anyway, having spm now and it ends at the 7th. Busy month la December :(

Ends at 7th, return books at 8th, Relative's wedding dinner at 10th, Alyssa's birthday on 12th, class trip on 14th-16th and I bet there's after-plan since it's just two nights, prom on 19th, (in between reunion of EV 21?22?23?), 25th Christmas already. How am I gonna see bryan lol AND WORK??? Mom wants me to work immediately. Seriously. Whateverfuck did I do to get NS which is already a 3 months thingy and she wants me to work IMMEDIATELY??? Later cannot??? I no need rest one lor???? Urghhhhhhhhhh.

WHEN WILL BE THE TIME IN MY LIFE THAT I CAN MAKE A FUCKING DECISION FOR MYSELF??????????????????????? AND I AM SO INDECISIVE MY WHOLE LIFE WHY????? ALL BECAUSE I'M USELESS IS IT? BECAUSE almost EVERYTHING I HAVE TO LISTEN I DON'T EVEN GET TO MAKE A CHOICE.

And one of my biggest problems. I can never decide. What I wanna eat? What I wanna do? What I wanna STUDY? Omgggggg sometimes I also wish I'm not so useless can?

ok bye.

T_T

2011-11-08T01:03:00.002+08:00

I REALLY NEED TO STUDY.

Long day..

2011-10-30T23:55:00.001+08:00

So yesterday I woke up at 12, because Alyssa called -.- Otherwise....

Met up with her and Richard at the library to study. Saw a lot of other people. As usual, they say. Guan Tatt came and joined us soon after. It wasn't as much study as you think lol.

Then I don't fucking remember what happened next. Urgh my almost malfunction brain. Stupid.

But then I had a huge fight, I also don't know why I cry lol. Then I slept at 2.30+ -__-

THE NEXT MORNING, because Richard left his phone in my sister's car, I put it in my room. HIS ALARM WAS 7AM. SERIOUSLY RICHARD. How is this not depressing. Eyes were sore and tired. Went back to sleep and woke up at 8. Prepared to go for tuition from 8.30 until 10. Seminar starts at 10, lol my life. Until 1.30 was Shi Yun's class. 2.30 to 6 was Yu Qin's class.

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS DROOPINESS OF MY EYELIDS.

One thing about me when I'm tired is, I become very.. Active. I don't know how to explain, but I just do. Because if I don't, I fall asleep immediately.

And here goes.. -.-

Look at my pretty friend Alyssa ^.^v

She is Chinese mix Indian, Chindian :)

Loveeeeeee.

This is Jia En. She is a HUMAN MAGNET. :)

Here is Alyssa again :D So pretty!!

Oh beeteedubs, she doesn't know how to speak Tamil HAHA

Alyssa with Daniel & Richard YES THE 7AM GUY IS THE ONE WITH THE JACKET FFFUU

LOL JK LA.
Monday tomorrow. K SHUT UP T__T
bye.

Cool story bro

2011-10-25T03:36:00.001+08:00

Hmmm looking at my blog layout I feel like tearing it, or uhm, changing it. But I like it so much, lol wtf.
Remembering Miyi said it looks like it has mold on it. Lol recalling the moment I heard it I was like, How is that even funny? But then I 'resolved' that cut on my chest tonight. CANNOT CRY OMG CANNOT CRY. LOL at times tears cannot control one but I think I'm actually very cool because I can make them not roll down hell yeah all hail me -.-v Anywayz, it's just I have to accept that, no one appreciates my sense of uhm...everymatherfuckingthing. It's so sad I have to live with my flaws, even sadder is knowing I cannot change it. Omg I can't stop thinking I am so ugly at times. I tell that to everyone but everyone is being so fucking polite and say "Omg no you're not!! You look just fine!!" Lol bitches be lyin. My standards for pretty people are so low, even my friends say people I say who are pretty are not pretty to them. SO IN CONCLUSION, when I say I am ugly, I really am like seriously. I seriously fucking hate it when people who are fine looking says they're ugly and fat or what so ever. I tend to get so angry. Their continuous whine enrages my palm and I really wanna yell at them "BITCH LOOK THE FUCK AT ME." So, if you have any of these: nice skin big eyes small nose not-fat arms skinny legs long legs nice thighs flat tummy small waist small hips long hair not-curly/frizzy hair nice hair nice boobs nice teeth healthy teeth etc OR JUST ONE OF THE THINGS I STATED? Then, for trillionth time, s.t.f.u. because I have none of those. I tell people I'm ugly not to get praised afterwards but because I want them to feel better about their so-called 'miserable life' yeah k cool story bro. REALLY I ALREADY KNOW I'M UGLY AND I HAD TO POINT IT OUT TO YOU TO PROVE YOU'RE PRETTY WHO ON EARTH WOULD DO THAT JUST FOR THEIR FRIENDS? Me. Just accept the fucking fact that you're fortunate to be born this way and shut up please I beg you you're just making me hate myself if you don't.

Please know that I am not trying to offend ugly people (like me) or unfortunate people because everyone is special. Even I'm special cause I sacrifice myself to prove to you lor ok. "Everybody is beautiful" this statement is not what you think it means. A lot of people use this statement because everyone is special no matter inside or outside, so they say. It's actually that one special thing that you feel good about yourself that gives you confidence. So that is the beauty. THAT is what is beautiful. You are beautiful because of your appearance. When you don't have a beautiful appearance, it is that special something that makes you beautiful. Omg I don't know how to explain but people always get mislead by this statement. They think they understand but they don't! Okay maybe some people do but if you think you understand you have to think again and again what makes you say that you understand. So hard to express myself seriously.

Well erm actually my purpose wasn't to talk about this but then.. I just had to be clear about this issue. No one listens to meeeh! Anyway what was i talking about again? Oh yeah. Me. Actually I don't think I'm very hard to understand, people don't understand me it's because they don't know how to understand only.. Ok sorry I know it's the same -__- Ok I admit sometimes I'm complicated, 'cause people never know what I want. But then sometimes I'm just like everyone else! I want the same things/feelings! I may have weird characters and interest in stuffs or overly obsessive at some point over some things/issue/people or maybe just too crazy and emotional and sentimental etc. I also want that ONE best friend you can have. Neh that one best friend you always think of first at anything that kind ah. I used to have one. At least, I THOUGHT I had one. She was the first person that came to my house almost everyfuckingday, text messages all day ok maybe not, but tell secrets first to her and vice versa, talk to her otp, wear my clothes all that kind of stuff. I really like that. But then well, I wouldn't say she changed or moved on or whatever. I think it's because she's had so many experience like that in her life she just feels very normal about it. She just doesn't need me like how I need her, first time I'm so close to one person like that, I am excluding bryan from this cause bryan is a different issue lol. I used to understand her so much, but then now, I don't know, I think I still understand her, and I always use that reason to miss her and not be sad or whatever. Just that, I don't think she understands this. I just really hope she's happy and I often wonder if she misses me or not. I just get so angry at times, but I miss her. I miss her even more when I look at her and xinning, jiaxi and waiyen, alyssa and miyi, eelynn and sookmin etc. I'm always a part of it because we're all like best friends but then I don't wanna imagine them pairs without one of them. Urgh I hope no one reads my blog seriously right now. I hope people will be like, omg so many words then close! Please don't read my blog please!! AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I WILL TYPE UNTIL THIS -.- I wanted to talk about me!!! zz. I wanted a nice ranting post without caring my grammar and shit but fail. Instead this is a fail ranting post but also a post without caring my grammar and shit success.

I wanna type about spm and my future one -_______- thanks for nothing to myself to always spreading my thoughts to other thoughts. I think I can continue this later hehehe 8) Typing all that shit then *looks at clock* 3.29 already. Some more need wake up early and clean my room and a lil bit of the house cause mom's friendS are coming over as a 'meet up place' for everyone zz. Sigh. my life. And these few weeks I don't even feel like touching the piano and guitar. Even if lazy I also will force myself. But lately I'm just really really not feeling right. I can't cope with higher grades already urgh fml. I must study also tim. Omg life. Life. LIFE.

Omgggg I wanna love my life!!

Bye.

Lunch w/ P4-ians & belated birthday

2011-10-24T00:04:00.001+08:00

LOL FUCK THIS IT'S 12.02 SO THIS POST IS ON MONDAY LOL FML LOL NO LA JK.

Whaddup bubbas. This is predictably a photo spammin session.
Highlights of this month. And yesterday went to Justin Lo's concert :') He is forever so lovely and adorable. Too bad he is migrating to Beijing T__T

Well here goes, they're not in order but I'm just happy looking at happy moments :')
My life is full of awesome people.

:-)

After Economics extra class. ♡♡

Got down the bus...

Snap!

and snap.

BEFORE AND AFTER! It was the most horrifying attack over food I've ever witnessed.

was otp with an unprofessional stalker.

I just wanted to tear down the sticker adsdfsjf;

@ Chilli's. Satisfied customers.

Loner ♡

♡

Babyyyyyy ♡♡

"乡下妹"

9 years friendship ♡

Erm I was quarreling with Minghong so I threatened to throw his bag at him.

Miyi, me and Tatt! :)

This issss finger-licking.

"Hi my name is Elaine and i love to pose like this"

Koaai dee Jiawen!

This has got to be my favorite picture of the day lol.

This is Jerica, she loves tits. Lol kidding, she eats them.

Elaine!

Another photo with the tit-eater YES YOU JERICA HOE YOU BE READIN THIS

TuckZZZwai :P

Limlee, Briana, Alyssa & err me.

Beebee ♡

LOL bitches be spoilin pictures ervywhere

After party for them lol.

Audiences.

Said hi to Ann & David at Starbucks, Borders. Then we left.

Day ended after tuition after that. Exhaustion maximum.

On the 19th of October. It was my birthday!!
Ok I don't wanna talk much because I'd talk about how sad I was sooner or later lol, then that'll make me a bitch cause everyone else was so nice to me, so no.

The attendance on the day before (Y)

Alyssa & Jerica ♡

I don't know what to feel about this picture. It's only here because it's hell cute. ♡

Present from Zhenyuan. :) Handmade.

Present from Alyyyssa, a polaroid camera just what I wanted! Haha thanks love ♡

Billy brought me a cupcake, how sweet, somehow he knows that I was lazy to go for recess I guess. Lol Silly Billy. :')

This is Jiaxi, her part time job is a Fountain 8)

HAHAHAHAAH JOKE LA. She's pretty and kind but she's spits water -.-

It's a long story.

I don't know what to say about my class. I just love all of them.

JERICA!! ♡ I love you so much you have no idea I can't even.

My beloved Madam Shan!

Guantatttt! :D He's my best friend.

UHM.

Miyi made this for me, you might not know but I wanted to cry when I saw this. Gosh ♡

This was from Jerica, exactly what I need :')

Cute like I don't know what.

So yeah, Happy Birthday to me.

Last picture of me with Alyssa, this was the last picture taken, also my favorite for the day.

Okay so my relationship with my best friends are like, for eternally because to me that's like friendship. I don't even know what is distance lol jk I know, just that it just doesn't matter, as long as we're still friends.

Okay so I have this kinda sentimental relationship with this person, I don't even know are we counted as friends or not, I get all emotional everytime I see him, yes butterflies in the stomach but don't get it the wrong way, I don't like, like him. It's just, when you see a person you feel something about them that attracts you and you wanna get to know them, happens to me a few times already. It's a very weird feeling. I don't know, he is so hard to see through. Which is rare. I just hope he is happy at all times.

Nvm ok end.

cluttered

2011-10-22T01:13:00.000+08:00

Hello. So emo I can die right now. I always over-think.

Oh and..

goodthenight.

RANT

2011-10-13T01:10:00.000+08:00

WOW 1.04AM SO DAMN BLOODY EMO RIGHT NOW SERIOUSLY URGH FOUGHT WITH BRYAN AGAIN FOR THE HUNDREDTH TIME ONE YEAR TODAY BUT EVERYTHING ELSE RUINED IT HMM MAYBE LIL BIT OF SCHOOL BUT MOSTLY OF COURSE IT'S BECAUSE FUCKING CLASS TRIP TO LANGKAWI CANCELLED THANKS TO PEOPLE WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE'S FEELINGS I AM SO DISAPPOINTED I CAN'T EVEN URGH BUT I CANNOT DO ANYTHING BECAUSE I LOVE THEM I DON'T WANT THEM TO FEEL BAD JUST BECAUSE OF ME. I DON'T CARE IF YOU DON'T KNOW ME WELL I AM MANY THINGS BUT NOT SELFISH.

I LOOKED FORWARD TO IT SO FUCKING MUCH CAUSE IT'S LIKE MARKING THE END OF MY HIGH SCHOOL LIFE WITH THIS CLASS BUT ALL I GET WAS JUST FIGHTING WITH MY MOM ABOUT CLASS TRIP I TOLD HER I WOULD FREAKING SAVE MONEY MYSELF EVEN THOUGH I AM IN NEED OF A NEW GUITAR I EVEN TOLD HER WHAT I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY WAS TO LET ME SAVE MY FUCKING MONEY TO GET THAT 2 THINGS URGHH SO MANY THINGS I WOULD DO JUST TO SPEND TIME WITH THEM BUT NO THEY WON'T UNDERSTAND COMPLAINING HOW PRICEY WAS THE TRIP SO YOU THINK POOR PEOPLE LIKE ME DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IS EXPENSIVE IS IT YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME GOING OUT SHOPPING EATING BUYING STUFFS I ONLY GET TO DO THINGS LIKE THAT ONCE A FREAKING BLUE MOON BUT NO YOU DECIDED TO JUST SAY YOU CAN'T GO CAUSE IT'S TOO BLOODY EXPENSIVE CAUSE YOU'RE NOT WILLING TO SAVE MONEY IS IT WHY CAN'T YOU BE FIRM ABOUT SOMETHING IF YOU REALLY DON'T WANNA GO YOU COULD'VE CLICKED THE FUCKING I'M NOT ATTENDING BUT INSTEAD YOU JUST TRIED TO AVOID THE ISSUE BY NOT REPLYING AND NOT GIVING A FUCK DO YOU KNOW HOW HURTFUL IT IS? XINYI SPEND SO MUCH TIME PLANNING ASKING YOU GUYS TO CONFIRM EVEN BARGAIN PRICES ALREADY TOLD YOU THE AGENCY CANNOT WAIT BUT NO STILL IGNORING IT URGH I EVEN WONDER THE NUMBER OF PHONE CALLS SHE MADE.

MAYBE YOU WOULD SAY I SHOULDN'T BE SO SENSITIVE ABOUT SOMETHING SO MINOR WELL IF YOU HAD THAT THOUGHT IN YOUR HEAD YOU ARE FUCKING JUDGING ME YOU HEAR ME BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO ME URGH LOOKING AT THEM DISCUSSING ABOUT IT AND VOTING THOSE THINGS MAKE IT WORSE WHEREVER THEY ARE PLANNING TO GO I DON'T FEEL LIKE GOING ANYMORE I DON'T WANNA WASTE MY TIME HOPING THEY MIGHT JUST DISAPPOINT ME AGAIN BY NEGLECTING THE PROBLEM CAUSE GENTING THEY CAN GO ANYTIME SO MAYBE THEY MIGHT NOT CHOOSE TO GO AND THERE GOES ANOTHER CANCELLATION SO I'M NOT GONNA TAKE THAT 'RISK' ANYMORE SO I DON'T WANNA CARE NOW.

SAVE MONEY AND BUY GUITAR THAT'S ALL.
Haih. I hope people realize time is passing very fast.

I love ya'll.

TIS' A GOOD TITLE

2011-10-07T22:42:00.000+08:00

I can't believe I'm actually updating my blog. But yeah, I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!

Please hold your applause :)

Okay just photos spammin I hope to have a post full of words one day which you won't read 8)
WHICH WILL COME SOON. I think. Just for my personal obsession for words 8)

THE LASTS OF SCHOOL (not really)

Best friends since Form 1.

Jerica P'ng. An awesome human being, proud to call her my best friend you know.

I LOOK UGLY I KNOW.

Bffs totally. But TOTAL meanies. And full of love.

After the 'seminar' for Economics. Lol so much going on seriously.

David tryna kick Lai Kuan's ass? Billy pulling a thumbs up pose(which clearly doesn't suit him)? Ee Leng saw a cockroach? Briana totez looking sexy. Lim Lee hugging our teacher omg is that even relevant. Ming Hong and Sze Huey's so-not-obvious-and-awkward distance. K ILOVEMYCLASS.

ANG ANG :)

SWISSY!! :)

Perrrrrfecto.

Heeheeeeee! Briana!

W/ the WEN GIRLS ;)

HAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA I DON'T THINK IT'S FUNNY AT ALL BUT I DON'T KNOW WHY I LAUGH AHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

So freaking cute seriously. Is that an indifferent look? Hmm.

Love.

When everybody does the :D smile = Perfection.

My beloved.

Billy trying to lick Kendrick? So appropriate in my class.

BELATED MID AUTUMN FESTIVAL AT ALYSSA'S

Sorry Alyssa I only care about you and me that day.

Warmth.

Warmer warmth.

SISTER'S BELATED BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION @ LATE GRANDMA'S PLACE

Peanut butter cake. NOT A FAN OF peanut butter, but am a fan of the cake 8)

<3<3 My sister.

With lil cousie Trixie :)

I just really like this picture, so hearty :)

My favorite :') So pretty <3

THAT'S JUST ABOUT IT.

SO IF YOU DIDN'T APPEAR HERE PLEASE DON'T BE SAD I'M JUST LAZY :)

SPM DAMN NEAR I DAMN SCARED :( BUT CAN'T WAIT FOR YEAR END HOLS.

MUST.STUDY.NOW.MUST.SAVE.MONEY.NOW.

Alright, lastly.

PEEKABOO

Volkswagen minor car show

2011-09-17T14:20:00.000+08:00

First Miyi came to my house 10 in the morning *yawn

:'D

*****

It was a longgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg wait.
But worth it, with ma girls :')

Sick cat

2011-09-05T01:32:00.001+08:00

Lied on my bed for two days. Sat on it for one. I am so screwed. My exams are screwed. So many things undone and incomplete. So, so, very screwed.

Feeling unwell. Even screwed. Can't imagine the embarrassment if I pass out or throw up in class.

Please just make everything stop. I can't bear with this pain in my stomach and head anymore. It's been 3 full days!!!! Don't make it feel like I have a baby in my stomach for crying out loud!

,

2011-08-29T01:12:00.001+08:00

Please don't say stuff like that because you don't know WHAT MY NIGHTS ARE LIKE.

Utterly hurt.

Quarter after one, raining sunday night.

Wish I was elsewhere without this in my head. Why do you think it's so easy.

Trials break!

2011-08-26T22:34:00.001+08:00

My prized possessions. My favorite girls.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

OMGOMGOMGOMG ONE WEEK BREAKKKK!
JUST IMAGINE THE AMOUNT OF TIME I WOULD SPEND ~~SLEEPING~~ STUDYING.
I'm.... looking forward.

Well Auntie Ivy came back from Japan and bought me this.

FANCY LOOKIN'.

:DDD SISTER LOVED IT.

And erm, this. Lol.

Toothpick? Candy? Cloth? Those were my guesses.

Well, yeah. Green tea leaves.

Little, wonderful, AND HAPPY things :)
These I bought them for US$ 1 each.

Fancy not? I love'em. Do you not?

Today. Spent my whole afternoon editing 91 photos -.- Took a lot of pictures smiling :D-ly.
I think when I'm around my girls and my classmates I'm just like that.
I feel like I can be anything I want, I can be original.
You know how hard it is for me to even feel normal? I wanna appreciate these few months.

I'm a little confused these few days. I don't know what I'm trying to do.

Trials growl

2011-08-22T22:39:00.000+08:00

I HAVE UGLY TEETH.

the end.

A DAY BEFORE TRIALS.

I gave in half of my life to sleep.
I guess I should pay the debts.

BUT STILL WISH ME GOOD LUCK PWETTY PWEASE.
tomorrow will be the day everything changes.

Little, wonderful things

2011-08-14T20:23:00.000+08:00

I have a thing for beautiful people, beautiful smiles, beautiful love, beautiful imaginings, beautiful memories, etc.
I am obsessed with them. Do you... not?

Why hello. I don't have a fancy and cool phone, but I have a fancy and cool message inbox.
Totally ~~reluctant~~ willing to show you lor ok.

NICE LEH!!!! HELLO KITTY RIBBON!! When I rotate the phone and it becomes....

NICE LEH!!!! I TOOK THIS PICTURE ONE LEH! And in the conversation thing...

NICE LEH!!!! I EVEN MADE THE BUBBLE GREY AND BLUE!! AND TRANSPARENCY!!

AND AND THE TOP REGION IS RED AND WHITE CHECKERS OMG NICE RIGHT!!

AND AND I ADDED THE EIFFEL TOWER!!! I think this is the nicest :D

And when I rotate the phone...

NICE LEH!!!!! I EVEN ADDED A RAINBOW!!!

THE TOP REGION I CROPPED MY PHOTO. That's why the green is nice. Metallic-ly.

p/s : I used a butterfly, a snowman and a bear to replace my contacts. I am so the smartest.

Like seriously la, based on your observation of the above, tell me, honestly,

AM I AWESOME OR,

AM I JUST TOO FREAKING AWESOME?

No?

Well.

Sorry I had to make this so hard to choose.

I ACCEPT YOU ANSWERING BOTH :)

k bye.

pain in the eye

2011-08-04T21:31:00.000+08:00

My eyes are in so much agony right now like seriously I feel like they're gonna ~~pop out~~ sink in anytime soon.
I kid you not.

They're totally supposed to be tearing but they are too dry and it's so tiresome to even tear. I feel like throwing them into cold water to cool and moisten them.

But it's my own fault since I cry so very much for the past couple of nights. Sorry.
I really did try to be okay, it's just sometimes I'm already so worn out to even try. Like physically, not emotionally.

Seriously. What a week.

ilovemylifeilovemylifeilovemylifeilovemylifeilovemylifeilovemylifeilovemylifelolnoilovemylifeilovemylifeilovemylife.

Oh nothing relevant

2011-07-31T00:56:00.000+08:00

I don't like nights like this.
Tears rolled down by themselves. Have I not a tear gland?
No seriously.

Today I spent ours worrying about something that I'm not even a part of.
Hence I believe I have come to a stage where I can never return anymore.
I think I should be happy about the fact that well, IT'S THE FACT. But no, I am not as happy as everyone think I am, to be honest. Seriously sometimes I am a ~~lie-depending-truth-ignoring~~ jerk.

I have to stop tormenting my eyes. My thoughts are taking over my emotions which is even worse than emotions taking over k.

After this there will be more nights like this. You really expect me to be anywhere but far from sad?
Proud? Of course. Delighted? Happy? Overjoyed? Surprised? Carried away?

Fuck no.

Wanting a change perhaps

2011-07-20T21:50:00.000+08:00

MOOOOOOOOOOOoooooo. Yeah hello. Do you know what is "shui wang wang de yan jing?"
No you don't.

Actually I just felt like typing something. Seems so normal tonight. And it's been very long since I have that kind of feeling that something is normal. I feel so normal I don't even think it's normal. Is that normal..?
Yeah k don't answer.

SO HOR I WENT TO GARY CHAW'S SENSATION CONCERT!!!!!!! :)))))))))))))

Bet you don't even know/like him thanks.
I CRY UNTIL HIPPO ALSO CAN LIVE IN MY EYES DY OK.
SOME MORE I GOT FLU. PEOPLE CAN DIRECT WATERWORLD IN MY NOSE DY OK.

Do you know what is hiperbola? I like it.

THIS PIC COOL LEH. YOU KNOW WHO TOOK IT?

not me.

After the concert. Do you have a sister as cool and sweet as mine? The answer is NO.

We even went to borrow a stack of chairs, my sister so lovely lor I know.

***

So hor actually that day I think got angel drop by my house and sprinkle some miracle dust on me. I went to clean my cupboard. *WAHHHHHH*

Found so many cool stuff that I own seriously, I think I'm a cool person now.

And also, unforgettable memories :*)

Ocean Park, Hong Kong, '08.

That wild lady above is obviously.... is.. is.... not me. She's my cousin who lives in HK.

She's actually wearing her school uniform, it was during winter that time I remember.

And my bag of presents from last year. And found this. You will never guess who wrote this :(

See how I neglected my tests? TH = tidak hadir = absent.

Sad life last year. This year both times my average at least 60++ lor k.

I 'sang sing' dy. LOL cantonese.

That thing on the left, my sister gave it to me :DD

Cute not? It's actually a colour pencil! :):)

On the right it's obviously a cellphone. Whose? Whose blog are you at?

Well on the phone itself I stick 2 hello kitty stickers :P And on the cover a red ribbon :D Nice I know.

// It's true. Music has its sentimental value.

So it's a date then.

2011-07-14T23:35:00.000+08:00

HAI. National Service next year! :) / :(

Actually I don't think it's that big of a deal. I'm okay with anything, whether I got selected or I didn't.
I want to go because it sure will be a very extraordinary experience and I just really wanna try something new. OH OH AND TO LOOSE WEIGHT. I'm quite a lazy person, and these few weeks I'm getting a lot more erm, lazy. I'm so desperate to lie on my bed doing nothing. Seriously. Some pleasure in life for me I know.

Part of me doesn't want to go 'cause I'll be leaving home for around 3 months :(
THREE MONTHS. Away from where I live, my friends, college... That's sad k.

Well the fact is the fact lor, I hope it will be fun and exciting.

Anyway life is erm, life. Ups, downs, everything! But I'm happy. Why?

Karma.

Nuh uhhh

2011-06-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

HELLLLLLLL NOUUUUUUUU I COULD'VE GOTTEN 7th IN MY CLASS BHUT NOOOO,
INSTEAD I GOT 8th, WHY YOU ASK? 0.4 MARKS DEDUCTED CAUSE I DIDN'T GO FOR HOUSE PRACTICE TWICE. LOL MY LIFE.

Well quite satisfied w my results anyway.

Teacher's Day 2011. Our school, is full of surprises.
Especially teachers themselves being a part of the lion dance performance, super awesome ya know.

HI LING LING WAS BACK :D !

HI WEI WEI WAS BACK! :D

After it ended ma girls and I decided to have a picnic next to the assembly ground. How awesome are we.

Saw our fab mates and took pictures of course.

And sometimes... I am the jerk spoiling people's photos HAHAHA!

MUCH LOVE.

#LIKEABAUS YAW.

BFFs.

School's 55th Anniversary.

Like I said, our school is full of surprises. The performances were soooooo.. great.

I was sitting up front so I see everything so clearly.

But after that, coming for class = not coming for class. Teachers taught nothing today. Uh huh uh huh.

Outside of the classroom -.-

WARNING.

FEAST YOUR EYES WITH 4 VAIN FEMALES.

9 (LOL FAIL)

10!

and lastly,

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE US OR WHAT. yeah k don't need your opinion.

So actually I'm trying to push myself these days. I promised I will try my best to be different.
I will be a better person.

Not only for her (cause she cried :/),

But for everyone I care about.

All that acting?

2011-06-19T00:08:00.001+08:00

Aren't my cousins cute? :D
Hmmm. Family...

Versus LIES.

I seriously LOATHE lying. It's the worst thing, and disloyal comes second. It is hurtful, offensive, absurdity!!!

Liars are a living lie. They do not deserve freedom of speech. I hate it when I HAVE TO lie, I feel so bad for the person I'm lying to. At that time I couldn't even bare to look at myself. Why must people be so selfish. Urgh.

Please just, think thoroughly before you really wanna lie. Think about other people's feelings, think about the consequences. Please be considerate, or decent, genuine.

A lie, can change, a lot.

Even a person's life.

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2011-06-15T21:14:00.000+08:00

:*)
You know, this is one animation movie I will never forget, I think I watched it three times.
It's just, so touching and sweet and cute and funny and sad. It has everything, to me.

Actually I just wanna say thank you to some people now. After that expressive post *lol I feel bad for even posting it, now many people thinks I'm an emo person wtf -.- Guantatt now calls me "The emo one", like that's my only name :) zz
Thank you Eeleng jiejie cause she sent me a long long facebook message, sort of comforting :)
And Evon jiejie cause she doesn't mind. Of me.
And Miyi, today she asked me,
"Eh, are you self-abased?"
I was like, "Lol. Duh. Everyday haha."
She then said, "Why do you even feel that way? You comfort us by saying not to feel sad about ourselves all the time but you on the other hand are always like that. Can you don't think that way?"

I....... laughed a bit -.-
Well at the moment it was kinda funny to me. 'Cause only Haoroong will say that kind of stuff to me so it felt more like he is comforting me so he says those things. But the look on Miyi's face was so sincere I had to listen to her. Then I start to think again lor, and realize I'm always like that. Always so negative about myself. But some days I feel good about myself too lor! So can't really understand what's my problem zz.

Certainly I won't be sad ALL the time one right. I am happy a lot also ma! Just that I get hyper easily then maybe a minute later I'm depressed. Stupid mood swing lor, don't know how to control my emotions lor, hot tempered lor, EQ low lor. So sad right.

I cannot forgive myself cause I;m not willing to try my BEST to change. But I have to so I can continue to try. Hehe all the best la rose!

what.

2011-06-09T22:46:00.001+08:00

SORRY I CAN'T ACCEPT THIS.
SORRY I HAVE BEEN DOING "WHAT I LIKE" THIS WEEK AND "TOOK ADVANTAGE" OF MY SISTER. WHAT FUCK? I LOVE MY SISTER.
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW BUT I NEVER ENJOYED THINGS I DID THIS WEEK THAT "I LIKED".
WHY DO YOU THINK I'M ALWAYS OKAY WITH EVERYTHING. I JUST WANNA DO THINGS THAT MAKE SOME PEOPLE HAPPY, SORRY SOME OF THE TIME IS NOT YOU. SORRY I CANNOT PLEASE YOU EVERY TIME. SORRY I AM BORN STUPID AND LIKES TO BE STUBBORN. I DIDN'T SAY I WON'T CHANGE, I DIDN'T SAY. SORRY I RUINED YOUR LIFE FOR THE BLACK CLOUDS I BRING.
I WANNA DO ONE THING I LIKE. FOR ONE DAY THIS WEEK. ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
OH PLEASE MISS EMIN APPRECIATE YOUR LIFE YOU ARE THE LUCKY BIRD, YOUR MOM NEVER TREAT YOU LIKE HOW SHE USED TO TREAT YOUR SISTERS BACK THEN, YOU SHOULD NEVER REBEL, YOU SHOULD LEARN TO BE MORE LIKE YOUR SISTERS, YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY WITH WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY.

WELL IN MY CASE I AM NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT HAPPY. about that.

I GUESS MY MOM TRAINED THEM WELL SINCE THEY WERE SO FUCKING INTELLIGENT WHILE I'M SO PATHETIC TO EVEN NOT REALIZE HOW AMAZING MY SISTERS ARE RIGHT? I SHOULD BE LIKE THIS I SHOULD BE LIKE THAT. HAVE I COME TO A STAGE WHERE I LOST ALL MY SENSES TO YOU? IT'S BAD ENOUGH MY MOM CAN'T BE HAPPY OF ME WHEN IT'S SO BLOODY OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE BUT YOU'D JUST LOVE TO SIT THERE AND BE JUDGMENTAL. ARE YOU TRYING TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOUR LIFE? HOPE NOT.

It's fine, I'm sure you've had bad days too. It's okay to be sad and you want to express. Everyone will come to a place where they feel helpless and lonely and depressed.

It's just that, I find myself there every single night.

DESIRE

2011-05-22T19:45:00.000+08:00

want'em sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo freakin bad.
i'd wear them everywhere. omgggggggggg $.$

k :(

#7, Day 213.

2011-05-12T20:22:00.000+08:00

Sorry. I just felt like it :D

MID TERM EXAMS STARTED!! WHEEEE! zz.

It's so sad I lost that OOHM mojo I had last term, I did quite well COMPARED to the past few YEARS.

No joke. This term, sigh. I will still do my best lor.

*****

Trying to live life more positively.

The "flower" I made from newspaper and coloured crepe paper :')

It's not easy seriously.

Attempt to keep the teacher out LOL.

Why my class has such funny minds.

This guy here... You'd think he is all shy with the fan covering half his face... Or maybe... Probably just picking his nose.. Oh but no...

EATING IN THE CLASS AFTER RECESS.

Messy hair :<
The good friend I've known for 9 long years, how we've grown.

She's taking off her braces next week! That's the reason this picture was taken :')

HAHAHA! Used the Fisheye thingy app. SO FUNNAY!

Kendrick and Billy :D

During Science extra class haha!

They were so deeply in their dreams.

So the weather for the past few days were sooooo hot, like HOT. Hedge, oh, tee, HOT.

Felt like our area was facing drought or something.

Crepe papers! :) :) :)

So pwettieeeeee right?

Last week, Alyssa bought this for my phone :)

So I took a picture of it. With bad lighting and a getting malfunctioned camera, comes a bad quality photo. Then I decided to edit it.

And it becomes....

TADAAAAAAA!

I think I edit dao very nice lor :D

Oh and, Yuri Kwon crosses my mind everyday :')

Mothers' Day passed, had a great dinner :)
But I cannot accept one thing.

Yeah you sure made me laughED.
Well facebook world is mostly based on erm... context?
You literally believe what you see or read. People are so easily influenced.
I'm sure most of you once you have read the status above, you would immediately click the "Like" button. Wtf la, What is so wrong saying you love your mom on Facebook? Not everyone in the world is as expressive as you in reality lor can or not? Since you are so damn wise (comments given by his friends), please don't judge people kthx. Better than some people never do or say anything. At least I'm certain everyone loves their mom by action or non action, by oral or non oral. I know it's your opinion well this is mine.

But what pisses me most is that he has to end it with "get a life." Dude do you even know what does that mean? Please use it somewhere more appropriate? If people say they love their mom on facebook they have no life? K you wise. Sorry they offended you by saying they love their mom. Just because you don't like it.

Kind of a hypocrite don't you think?

whip ma phone.

2011-04-25T22:14:00.001+08:00

Oh hellow!

We look awesome ikr.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO MY TWO BEST FRIENDS :')
LOVE YOU GUYS TTM.

I am blogging with Blogger-droid now omg super awesome. I am currently addicted to my phone. I personally think it can stand a line with the iPhone. The Android Market is... full of possibilities!

Lol resisting myself. Bye.

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I may not have given you a lot to remember, but please don't forget me.

2011-04-17T23:39:00.000+08:00

What is this feeling right now, I seriously have no clue.

I feel so out of place, broken, the very worst state of being sad?

I feel as if I am too much and too little at the same time.

I cannot simply just "SUCK IT UP" this time, I really can't.

Dear lord why you do this to me.

One thing first,

2011-04-11T00:21:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAO XUEEEEEEEE! HEEHEE!
I wonder why she made everyone think yesterday was her birthday so I had to make my point :)

I really miss you a lotttttttttt, sometimes I don't even remember you're gone. For real.
Do come back once in a while pretty pleaseeeee! :')

Tuesday blues

2011-03-29T20:46:00.000+08:00

I don't like today, don't like it :(

Period pain zzz. The cramps can be so confusing for the whole day, half the time I don't know whether am I having cramps or hungry. Seriously. I eat and eat but that thing is still going on, so maybe it was the pain all along, or was I too hungry? It hurt so bad.

So many things happened today, hmmz.

OH YA! Mommy came back from Taiwan, she told me all she did was eat, eat, eat.
So good :( She keep asking me to save money to go there cause everything there is so cheap :(

She bought this for me!!!!!!!!

So cute righttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt! Mine was the cutest among my sister and cousin :P

But seriously I have no idea where to put them.

And and I used pinhole mode to take these!! I think very nice lor heehee :)

And another thing she thought was "sweet and cute" she bought was this...

Know what it is? :) So easy I'm sure by even looking at it you know right? Right :)

YES!!!!! CORRECT!!!

Congratulations, You got it wrong.

It's a fold-able mirror -.- Why in the world would I need one?

NOMMMMMMMMMMMMMM :)

She told me this very nice and so when we were in the states I bought it but then I think she forgot she told me then she bought it again in Taiwan yeah so err yeah. It's nice :)

Hi, sorry for not telling you everything, sorry that I thought you'd understand.
I guess I was wrong about you. You are just like her. No wait that's so bad, she's mean and you're not.

Maybe, yeah maybe we're just not supposed to be alike.

One of my firsts.

2011-03-24T00:04:00.004+08:00

Cuteeeeeeeeee :) Sister's keychain!

For the first time in my life........... -- I twisted my ankle. My right ankle.
It was so stupid seriously, I still can't accept this -.-
I was walking down the stairs, and I have 2 steps left. But then my eyes decided to BLINK (yes that's when you have your eyes closed fyi) I didn't manage to land my feet on the step instead on the pointy front, and I well, SLIPPED and fell down and twisted my ankle.

I actually AHHH!!!-ed and then CRACK!!! went my ankle, I thought it broke or something. The sound was so horrifying. My tears were about to come out but I never let them. I was at Yamaha. Erm duh it's a PUBLIC place I wouldn't want any unnecessary attention. Few people walked pass me while I just sat there. I just SAT there on the floor. Pretending to have lost my senses by trying to not notice anyone walking by. Only a kid stopped and offered to help but I refused to let him 'cause I thought I can never stand again =________=

Yesterday it got so much better but after school met up with my ex-schoolmates MY BFFS :')
Walked almost everywhere so then it hurt again zz. Couldn't take the bus home then had to call up grandpa to come pick me up :(
And today!! I woke up with my left feet hurting must be 'cause of the jumping with one leg because the right one hurt the day before -.- But it was better later. I was so happy. Both legs were recovering fast! :)
BUT, silly old me did something silly again. Since my legs are better I decided to walk all the way to the school canteen to eat :) I was really cautious, and it was all good. UNTIL....... After recess.
I was walking up the stairs very very carefully but then this girl behind me was like me, she tripped and fell. But the best part was when she fell she LITERALLY GRABBED MY TWISTED ANKLE. I shouted.
I told Miyi about the incident to maybe somehow get her sympathy but instead she laughed at me aww how sweet. !@$^*&%$# :)

LITERALLY GRABBED MY TWISTED ANKLE = WITHOUT ANY KNOWLEDGE-LY PUT HANDS VERY DAMN TIGHTLY WITH MAYBE THE STRONGEST GRIP EVER GRIPPED IN HUMANITY ON MY SPRAINED ANKLE WHICH IS THE PLACE NEAR THE KNUCKLE OR WHATEVER. AND I WAS LIKE,

And the pain is back. Tough luck eyh little ankle.

But tonight got to spend time with my sister again since mommedie-mom went to Taiwan. Did so manythings with her in one short night :')
I went out with ONE headband and came back with THREE. My lovely sister is such a ME-wannabe :P She bought 2 for herself. She didn't want any on her head just now so she insisted me to put them on -.-

Left one is the original one which means is mine.
And the other 2 are hers -.-

CHS Idol audition tomorrow omg. Should I feel nervous?
Won't be able to go for Sukan Tara :( stuuuuupid leg. ffffffffffffuuuuuuuuu.

Good night.

Like seriously?

2011-03-20T03:57:00.000+08:00

HAI HERE I AM AGAIN 3 IN THE MORNIN.
Sorry I don't know what fucked my sleeping time.

What I've been doing these nights :

STARE BLANKLY AT THE AIR
SCROLLIN JERICA'S TUMBLR FOR HOURS
LISTENING TO VARIOUS ALBUMS WITH MA HEADPHONES
SCROLLIN JERICA'S TUMBLR FOR HOURS
LYING THERE DOING NOTHING/THINKING
MAYBE SCROLLIN JERICA'S TUMBLR FOR ANOTHER HOUR
OR KEEP SCROLLIN AND SCROLLIN UNTIL I STOP THINKING TOO MUCH
AND PROBABLY THINKING ABOUT MY BB I MISS YOU SO MUCH OMAIGAT
while scrollin jerica's tumblr... and stare blankly a little bit more.

I can't help it. My room, it's one place my body relax, but never my mind. It's kinda like my inspirational sanctuary. My mind would be filled with infinite possibilities, imagination, fantasy, dreams. I stare at nothing for hours thinking, then fall asleep. I have no reality in my room, I do whatever the fuck I want.
I know people love their room and sort, and would invite friends over for sleepovers, hide from fights, cry quietly under your pillow, or what normally people do with their room. I can't, I'm not like that. Of course I cry and I hide here, where else right? Right. Well to me it's one place I am fully myself. I simply CANNOT, yes CANNOT stand a clean room. I do all my stuff here (not tryna sound like an artsy bitch k), I draw my best. What I see can relate to anything at all. When I sing, I feel so extraordinary, so, me. And that's the most important of all I've stated. I feel my passion increases each day and it's such joy such thing exist. It's where I am accepted for being me, critic-free. I don't wanna be a perfect daughter or sister, a smart student, a dull relative, an over-hyped stranger, a weird friend, a great lover. Of course I'd be super glad to be what you want, although already a fact I can't be what you think I should be, and won't letting me be what I wanna be, I'm sorry and I must then be my desired me. Please just, oh goodness. I have always know what I want. And EXACTLY what I want, I have never been capable of understanding how I feel.

Wait.

WHY AM I IN AN EMOTIONAL STATE LIKE SERIOUSLY?
INSOMNIA IS TAKING OVER OH MY GOD REALLY?
DAMN FEELINGS CONQUERING ME OH COME ON.

CUT ME SOME MENTAL SLACK.

STUPID MIND HAVE YOU NOT PLAYED ENOUGH GAMES.

"This is Michael Bublé"

2011-03-19T20:40:00.001+08:00

Hmm tried to make it look artistic lol. I want my wall to be filled up heehee :)

SO TODAY I SPENT ABOUT WHAT, 3/4 OF MY AWAKE TIME IN FRONT OF THE TV.

ONE OF THE BEST FEELING IN LIFE.

I watched the Michael Bublé special as titled above on Starworld :*)

Half the time I was practically suffocating, and the other half taking pictures madly.

Oh god why you do this to me. I wish I was rich enough to have the Astro beyond and get that record thingy! :( I'd watch it a million times and without fail crying each time i watch it.

WHY HE SO PURRRRFECTTTT.

"I REALLY WANNA BE AN ENTERTAINER."

"I WAS CERTAIN ABOUT IT SINCE YOUNG."

HE LIVED IN THE BUS, THE BIG BUSS YEAH WHERE HE TOURS AROUND. AND THIS WAS HIS SUITE HAHA.

HMMM..

"I'M HAPPIER NOW."

"WHEN YOU'RE HAPPIER IN YOUR LIFE, IT CAN BE SEEN."

SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL HE WAS PLAYING ICE HOCKEY WITH ONE OF THE TEAMS FROM UK, AND HIS NICKNAME WAS "BOOBS"

OH HAI I'M JUST GONNA SIT HERE, PRETENDING TO LISTEN TO EVERYTHING YOU SAY, CAUSE I LOOK GOOD THIS WAY.

FIN :(

CLEARLY I HAVE NO LIFE WITHOUT HIM.

Me and Mrs. Jones.......~

OH BUBBS.

Why?

2011-03-19T03:26:00.000+08:00

It's like 3.30 in the morning.
I can't. I just can't. It's gonna be a new Saturday when I wake up. No, I, can't.
Damn. Why are you doing this to me. I really can't.

I miss you oh my goddddddddddd.

Melancholy!!!!!!!

(two of the) Love of My Life

2011-03-17T18:18:00.000+08:00

I learnt from my sister to use this in case anyone gets jealous *lol :)

OH HAI MY NAME IS QQ QUINCE TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY :D
HEEHEE I LOVE YOU BB :*)

MY SISTER GRADUATES TODAY! :D:D:D:D

WE LOOK HAPPY DON'T WE? :')

WE LOOK ALIKE TOO HEEHEE!

LOVE YOU SIS!

Genting trip!

2011-03-16T00:20:00.003+08:00

Here's roughly (maybe not even) it.

Group photo!

Xin-Ning, Quince, Jiaxi, Me, Miyi, Sookmin & Eelynn :D

US WITH ELECOLDXHOT ECX :D:D:D:D:D:D

We were the first to recognize them and the first to take a GROUP picture with them how cool are we huh? :P I think thoughout their whole performance only mWE were screaming :D

Awwww such a sweeet photo :')

This was the next morning :)

HAO PENG YOU!

BEST FRIENDS!

KAWAN BAIK!

HOU PANG YAO!

GIRLFRIENDS!

RAKAN SEBAYA?

WE QQ NOT? *WINK ;)

L O

V E

heehee! :)

SUPER LOOKS LIKE OOI LEIA OK.

JIAXI :)

DARL :*)

MY HAIR COLOUR COOL RIGHT I KNOW THANK YOU :D

BEEBEELOWMITMIT :D

The second photo was PURE candid.

With Xin-ning & Miyi :)

OMGWTFZZZ!!! SO QQ ORH! :D:D

Yeah well that's about it.

Had super lot of fun. Mostly because we're awesome. But no doubt about that. Hehe :)

I hope we can do this again :*)

Yesterday night Haoroong fatt hao. Don't wanna show me his face :( But still so qq heehee.

QQ!

Sister's convocation tomorrow, I don't know what to wear :(
Sometimes I wish nice dresses will magically appear when I wake up the next morning.
Ohmaigatz. Sighz. 12.30. Good night.

2011-03-15T00:09:00.000+08:00

OMG WHY IS THIS HAPPENING WHY OMG.
EVERYONE'S GONNA KILL ME IF THEY FIND OUT.
OMG PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME IT'S NOT TRUEEEEEEEE!!
DEAR GOD WHY.

Lol this made me laugh, why Plez so cute you tell me. I've known him for 4 years now, he didn't quite change a bit. Always the joker in class. Awesome.

First term holidays starts!

2011-03-13T18:30:00.000+08:00

HELLOz! HEEzHEEz! :D

HI I AM MALAYSIAN CHINESE AND I HAVE COMMONLY SMALL EYES HOW COOL IS THAT. Zzz.

Look at Sookmin! She is the so very QQz! :*)

Firrrrrzly,

EXAM'S OVERRRRRRRRRRR!

Secondly,

I JUST CAME BACK FROM GENTING HIGHLANDS! :D

Had such a great time with my babes. Cannot accept how happy I am -.-

Well this one week holiday I have art, moral, civics projects & malay, english dramas to be done.

, SCREAMINGZ IN AGONY.

I'd rather be having normal school days with bunch of shitty homework :(

Hm, life.

I just wish my results will be how I expect them to be. Bye.

DISTRESS

2011-03-07T01:12:00.001+08:00

THIS PERIOD OF TIME -- EXAMINATION.

WARNING : POST SPAM WITH CLASS PICTURES.

TO DISTRESS MYSELF I LOOK AT HOW AWESOME MY CLASS IS.
YOU DON'T? PFT, IKR? WHAT A PITY.

LOOK AT THOSE PEOPLE THAT WERE DISTRACTED BY ME.
YOU FAIL.
LOL SEE THAT EMPTY SEAT? MINE.

FOOD GRABBIN'!!!!!!!!
I WAS STANDING ON MY CHAIR 8)

REAGAN, ME, ALYSSA, YUCIN, MINGHONG
WHY IS MINGHONG SO GAY.
BUT I LIKE IT 8)

AIN'T WE AWESOME. I KNOW.

SOME OF THE GIRLS. THE OTHERS WEREN'T IN THIS PIC PROBABLY CAUSE THEY DON'T LOVE OUR CLASS BOOHOO. LOL JK CAUSE THAT DAY EVERYONE WAS BUSY FOR THE PHOTO TAKING SESSION FOR THE 12 BUCKS SCHOOL MAGZ.

GIRL POWER!!!!!!!
BRIANA, ME, ANGELA, LIMLEE
QUINCE, MIYI, JIAXI.

GUY POWER!!!!!!!!
IN THE AIR : MINGHONG, KOKHONG, ZHENYUAN
ON THE GROUND : YUCIN, CHOOLIANG, RICHARD

"WE ARE AWESOME LIKE THIS"
SO COOL RIGHT I KNOW 8)

XIN-NING & QUINCE, ME & MIYI
GOING TO OLDTOWN 8)

THREE OF US WITH MY GLASSES ON HEHEHEHEHE WE QQ 8)

XIN-NING SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
POSING WITH THE CRACKER QUINCE BOUGHT FROM BANGKOK.
TASTY SHIZ.

ANOTHER ADVENTUROUS EPISODE OF "BRIANA GONE WILD" FT. GUANTATT.

ALYSSA & WAIKIN QQ TOGETHERRRRRR!

QUINCE, MIYI & ME
WE SO LOVELY I KNOW HEHE :)

SO.. AGAIN,
IN THE AIR ON A PIG : MIYI & BRIANA
ON THE GROUND WITH A PIG : ME & DANIEL

DANIEL IBANEZ. WHY YOU SO HANDSOME WHEN YOU SLEEP 8)

*WINK WINK*
LIMLEE, YANNHOW & BRIANA QQ!!!
LOOK WHO IS BEHIND POSING HHEHEHEH :P

DO RE MI FA... SO?

QQ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
XIN-NING AND CHOOLIANG.

PLEASE.JUST. I CAN'T.EVEN. SIGH.
IGNORE RICHARD.

INTRUDER ALERT!
ISAAC BEING SENT AWAY TO SIRIUS BLACK'S OLD TOWER. LOL JK THEY JUST WANNA SLAUGHTER HIM WITH THEIR KICK ASS MIND SKILLS...WITH A SMILE ON THEIR FACE IDK WHY THOUGH.

OMG ANOTHER CUTIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

TAKEN WITH ANGELACHAI'S IPHONE :)
I LOVE YOU!

GIRLS WILL BE GIRLS.
AND GUYS, WELL. ARE GUYS.
WE AWESOME I KNOW.

ME, MINGHONG & QUINCE :)

WE QQ NEH! :D

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!
WANNABES : A RABBIT, AN ANGEL, A REINDEER.

YANNHOW WAS TALKING TO ME AND LAUGHING THEN I SHOVED THE CAMERA AT HIS FACE.
MINGHONG WAS DAYDREAMING AND NOTICED I WAS HOLDING A CAMERA WHEN HE LOOKED DOWN.
RICHARD WAS ERM.... SMILING AT THE CAMERA WITH HIS FRAMELESS GLASS -.-

TUITION AND SEMINAR! :DDDDD
SUCH FUN TIMES WITH FUN PEOPLE!!
LEFT : SH' YUN,
MING YOKE,
US PEOPLE.
RIGHT : ME & MYMY *NOTICE OUR CLOTHING?
ME AND BRIANA. IKR!!! :')

PICTURES OF AWESOME ME WITH AWESOME PEOPLE WHICH HAVE EQUAL AWESOMENESS IN MY AWESOME LIFE/ THEIR LIFE. 8)

OKAY I SPENT A LOT OF TIME EDITING PICTURES I KNOW WHAT IS MY LIFE OK SO DON'T JUDGE QQQQQQQQQQ! :)

QQQQQQQQQQ = Qx10 = TEN Q = THANK YOU

MY EQUATION MAKES SENSE SO YEAH.
P/S : TYPING IN CAPS LOCK IS COOL YOU SHOULD TRY IT SOME TIME WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO DISTRESSING YOURSELF. IT DIDN'T WORK? WELL I SAID TRY.

SOMETIMES, I LOOK INTO THE MIRROR AND ASK MYSELF,
"WHY AM I SO ERM.. ERR.. NOT PRETTY?" *UGLY TOO STRAIGHT FORWARD*

AND YESTERDAY I ASKED,
"WHY AM I SO LAZY AT TIMES?"

THEN LATELY.......I REALIZE SOMETHING. THERE IS ONE ANSWER TO ALL THE WHY'S.
WHEN PEOPLE ASK.. SING THEM A SONG.

" I'M BEAUTIFUL IN MY WAY CAUSE GOD MAKES NO MISTAKES.
I'M ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY I WAS BORN THIS WAY "
- LADY GAGA

BYE!! I WILL SURVIVE FROM THE DROWNING OF BOOKS.
YEAH RIGHT WHO AM I KIDDING.
IT'S LIKE TELLING PEOPLE WOMEN DON'T SWEAT OR CRY WHEN THEY GIVE BIRTH ZZ.

HAOROONG DIDN'T SAY GOODNIGHT AND FELL ASLEEP :(
I GO SAD NAO BAI.

Last week.

2011-02-24T00:05:00.000+08:00

was great :*)
There will be sad days too but who's counting or even giving a damn? ~~sometimes I do. just sayin'.~~

♥♥ My lovely ladies. Loveeeee this.

Taken by Fling! :D

Weici, Christine, Sookmin&Sarah, Waiyen, Miyi, Alyssa ♥♥

Although I look kinda cmi in some of it :(

Love yous.

Heehee all my friends so QQ neh ♥♥

from Seanbeh's album.

Top : Me, Alyssa, Miyi ♥

Bottom : Alyssa, Sarah, Sookmin ♥

Sookmin so cuteeeeee!

HAHAHAHAHAHA! LOOK AT PLEZ.

*the person awkwardly posed fyi

You have no idea how much I laughed when I saw this picture for the first time!

Tuition timeeeeeeeeees! :D

Briana, Joyce, Me, Guantatt ♥

KAWAII DESU!!! ♥.♥

Haoroong & Jengtung!

So qq ohhh :')

*LOL

Top : "POINT AT RANDOM PLACES!!"

Bottom : "TEACHER"S HERE!!!"

Top : "GIVE ME SAD!"

Middle : "GIVE ME ANGRY!"

Bottom : "GIVE ME CRAZYYY!!!"

LOL MY CLASS IS FULL OF FUN.

Yenyen gave me this heehee!

Ribbon qq hor?

Lili's roses :') ♥♥

Got scolded by momeddie mom cause of this though :(

NOT FORGETTING.
JERICA.

LET ME TELL YOU WHO WAS SHE OBSERVING.
WAIKIN AND MINGHONG.
WHY?
THEY GAY.
WHY?
THEY TOUCH EACH OTHER SO MUCH AND WAIKING KISSED MINGHONG'S BACK.
WHY?
THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS :)
WTF AM I TALKING ABOUT I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT.
I MEAN,
THEY GAY.

Well anyway I've been reading oatmeal.com :D

LMFAO.

Oh yeah have you heard about the school (somewhere in the states) that banned girls from wearing Justin bieber's tees to school?

THIS IS FAR WORSE THAN BEING RACIST.
I think he (I ASSUME IT'S A GUY YES I ASSUME SO STHU) is mentally ill or some sort. NORMAL haters won't say things like that. They'd only be like "IN YOUR FACE BIEBS" or "LOL AT THE GAY" or something like that.
I still love Justin so sthu again ♥

COLORS WHY I'M AWESOME? NONE. I AM JUST PLAIN AWESOME.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2011-02-15T17:50:00.000+08:00

Although it's the 15th now -.-

I HAVE TWO NOW!! :'D *the background nice eh? :P

Heeheehe! Special peoples :) Love! xoxo.

Anyway I feel so happy yesterday although I had a tineee fight with momeddie-mom :(
But overall it's all good.
It's such a bliss to see people smile at you and when you actually see their eyes sparkle, like they really mean they're smiling at you, like they really love you, like you mean something to them.

I even got a hug from Kiukiu :*)
Sookmin's class was next to mine, and yesterday she came in, WHEN THE TEACHER WAS THERE TOO, and came and hug me and others. The teacher didn't even notice her when she even walked ALL THE WAY to my place which is in the middle of the class to hug me. Lol, quite random but so niceee :*)

Anyway, after so long I finally found my friend's friend who is gorgeous.
I cannot stand people WITH BRACES AND A VERY NATURAL SMILE ON THE SAME FACE when they're in a picture. If I were a guy I'd throw some melting chocolate right at my own face and restrict myself for licking the chocolate away, or ever eating chocolate again, if I don't fall for her.
But she removed her braces not long ago... Oh well.

Heheheh.
I blurred the background yay me! Which is nicer? :D

I like many many colours when I edit :D
Which will degrade the original one...

*LOL

Oh and, meet two of my best friends. They're in my funny-and-retarded-but-long-lasting category :)

HAHAHA!
Eelynn & Sookmin

K tenQ baizz.

Lunar New Year!

2011-02-03T23:22:00.000+08:00

LOU SANG!!!!!!! :D *purposely made the picture look old but it's not lololol wtf

恭喜发财!
Happy Chinese New Year!

Cutesy little cousin brothers! :*)

The week started gloomy though.

Hope all the Chinese out there (even if you're half or a quarter or a half of a quarter or what ever) will enjoy this week full of prosper! The streets though, have been pretty quiet... But in contrast there were fireworks all night hehe!

AT LEAST TRY TO ENJOY IF RIGHT NOW YOU ARE NOT, LOOK AROUND, MAYBE EVEN AT THE CORNER, SOMETHING AMAZING IS HAPPENING.

Just sayin.
Bye! x

First holiday of the year.

2011-01-29T00:14:00.001+08:00

Hello Kitty lovely goodies from the states from sister and some bought by myself heee! :)

Momma came back from the states on Tuesday. Which was, somehow sad..
I started to get used to the month's lifestyle but when she's back there will be changes.
But glad to see she's fine, and what's even better?
Sister has got no posting! She's not going anywhere! :*)

School have been perfectly normal, or I shall say, GREAT.
Exclude the sad and down stuff which I care less about, I feel so happy these days.
We're so appreciative over each other now, since it's the last year, and so many people left the school.
First Xueyi, then Yixian, then Chengyeen, then Tzewei. Not to mention the people I don't know! :(

Anyway, the CNY holidays started. YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
Since it's Friday and there's no co-curricular activities tomorrow, as soon as I got home, the laptop is active ;)
I'm so happy to talk to people, it's sad we can't talk face-to-face though :(

Minghong's profile picture featuring ME! :D

Well today I added more photos to my USA album.
After uploading'em I closed Facebook deciding to just chill and listen to songs. But sampat people like me after an hour I decided to sit up and on the laptop again. And I saw this :

Like :O
IT'S LIKE ONLY AFTER AN HOUR.

I found out who the criminal was.

Then I realize.... -.-

Later at night.

Like :O *again
AND IT'S ONLY HER TOO.

Her turn *lol

Miyi is counted too although she has been chatting with me while liking almost every photo -.-

She's raped like Dhaniah either :)

Superb highness. Talked to crazy people about crazy stuff. *especially sharing secrets with Fling hehe

For once he couldn't stand me!! Each day his the one bugging me and now.
Vengeance is sweet hehehehehe.

Oh you know now I know why people like to whore in front of their webcams.
Because you don't look THAT ugly while you're doing an ugly expression :)

My hair LOOKS so long :(

BYE HAPPY CRYNESE NEW YEAR AND HAPPY BORIngDAYS.

Senior year.

2011-01-23T16:23:00.000+08:00

My weird, abnormal, but LOVELY class 5P4 :*) //lovin' the bow i made

I just realized the new blogger can do this, THE IMAGE NOW CAN BE SO BIG :O

Hm, I find it rather pointless for me to talk about something school-free.
This will be my last year in high school and I'm trying to enjoy the very best of it.
Remembering how devastated I feel about coming back to school, feeling like I'm trapped in this dilemma, doubting my own ability to accomplish the work given (I still do anyway), even wasting my precious time finding out who the freaking telltale was.. I feel like slapping myself with my own bare hands zz.

Such a bliss to have enough of company (my classmates are so definitely top of the list & my long-term bff's) and support (my supersister), the rest is up to me myself.
Although I will never be perfect to you.. Yeah it's sad.
BUT I WILL SUCK IT UP AND BE MY OWN PERFECT ME.
So suck that up, peaches.

I am me.

#endcraptalk

POW POW!

2011-01-22T23:57:00.000+08:00

Michael Steven Bublé ♡

How can you resist him? I simply couldn't.

MUST.GO.CONCERT.

TO.SHOW.LOVE.

AND.

PROPOSE.

Little snow!

2011-01-15T23:36:00.005+08:00

She is like, the first person ever that I know about, loves her cat a lot, and looks like a cat.

In a very cute way :)

She can't even stay after Gerko Day.

Partly a good thing though, or else I can't even focus on my duty that day.

This made me teared a lil bit (really just a bit) :

:*)

Xiaoxueeeee,

I still remember the first day we met, you looked so shy! As always.

It was just like yesterday, and I remember every moment of it.
We've only know each other for less than 6 months, seems like a lifetime to me already.

Please stay the way you are, I like this xuexue more than enough.

I'm gonna miss you!

If you realize you screwed up, you're not screwing up.

2011-01-09T22:53:00.006+08:00

Ahhhhhhh, so one week passed. It's so fast it felt like, 7 days.

Ever since I'm back everything I see here it'll be like, "Like wth the states is so much better." or "Why everything here is so messed up, I never had any serious worries there." or "People there are so much bloody nicer than people here."

Not to mention the price of Tommy Hilfiger :D :D :D

Or candy :D :D :D :D :D

And more candy :D

No la, this one is from one of my bao bei's.

Anyway........... I feel really sad being back but, my life is here. All my pretty babies from school, my lovely family (that can sometimes be too much for me but whose are not right?) that I relate to, and everything I own. My comfy bed, especially. Not tryna be racist but sometimes the black people here scare the hell out of me.

Today, I saw something different.

Fyi I have a supersister, be jealous ok? :)

Sister drove us to a stationary shop at Taman Megah and while on the way back she kept getting pissed off cause she always end up at the wrong road/direction. Suddenly we were in this neighborhood and there were three Indian guys walking together, er, horizontally. So it's kinda close to hit the person on the outside if you get what I mean.

Then suddenly the other 2 guys heard the car coming and they quickly pulled the third guy closer to them with a very very (VERY) brotherly feel. *jaw drop moment.

Like, HECK YEAH BROMANCE ♥

I feel so.. so... indescribable. Touched, I suppose.

Ways you treat people you care about, maybe they can't feel it, but we can see it.

It's the heart that counts :) I really like this statement.

Annie wei #2, I think the first week of school was brilliant, very well spent. It's so good to see everyone again, always thinking why I feel empty and just when I see those babies my life totally brightened. But getting your fuh-rick-een duty on the first day wasn't that good, somehow I can never learn how to arrange duties for people and end up I wanna do it myself. Lol how sad is that. But I have a very supportive sister living with me, so it's great :*)

I went to Mingway's birthday dinner with Quince on Thursday. Before that I had totally forgotten it was his birthday. I felt so so guilty when he called and asked whether we could join his family. BTW HUEYTENG I MISS YOU :D

I called him before I leave, apologized like ten thousand times..

"HELLO? HI MING WAY! Omg I'm sorry so so sorry I forgot it's your birthday! I am so gonna be there. I feel so guilty! I'm such a bad friend omg. I planned to call you the day before but I slept at 11.30 so..."
"Hello? I can't hear you clearly." *I actually whispered fuck you lol*
"Heck. I said i'm sorry I forgot it's your birthday. So happy birthday."
"WHAT? YOU FORGOT? I.. I.."
"I'm really really sorry :("
"Well.. Friends forget stuffs too, so it's all forgiven."

I instantly felt like crying. You are so great, best friends forever.

LOL that's gay.

Something that happened a thousand times, happened again today.

So, I'm like a freaking noodle to everybody.

And sometimes I'm like the one with very small eyes.

Yeah I remember all you non-noodle big eyes freaks. Catch up sometime aite :)

School tomorrow, WHY MAN WHY.

I really really dislike Mr. Michael. In a very bad way. I know he's trying to lecture us, I really understand like really (cause my sister is a teacher too). But all his bullshit and bragging make me feel like dying each time he enters the class. I'm sorry. I think you're funny at times, but, seriously dude. Take a chill pill.

See ya, won't wanna be ya!

TWENTY ELEVEN.

2011-01-01T16:08:00.006+08:00

SUP MAN. After the trip I say this everyone I meet.

Anway, Happy New Year!

I spent new year's eve with my sister and Xiaoying at Tropicana City.

Which was rather meaningless cause we didn't know what to do, until the fireworks started :) I pity short people (like me) cause in a big crowd, tall people always have the advantage to see what short people won't be able to see.

After the movie and everything went to Kayu for supper, which means, my first meal in the year 2011 was................ *drum roll*

TANDOORI CHICKEN!!

Since when the chicken is so nicely placed in Kayu? Lol.

Well anyway, I got pretty sad cause I have to come back to this god forsaken place. Okay I'm sorry I have to say that. But people back here aren't nice. I love my country, but some people are just ruining it.

Never mind.

You know, I feel like such a bad-ass after overcoming the fuhrickin blizzard. Cause it's something you'll never see here. And I didn't fall sick and fainted or what so ever. But the weather back here is just too damn horrible!! I still love my country :)

I went to We R Who We R's video on youtube again just now and I just realize this ^ lol.

I'm going to a gay friend's house later. Not planning to tell you who is it. IT'S MING WAY OKAY IT'S MING WAY. This is you : WHAT? HIS GAY?

Still not planning to tell you who it is, so give up.

Merry belated Christmas!

2010-12-27T10:43:00.004+08:00

BeRightBack.

:*)

It's starting to look a lot like Christmas!

2010-12-20T11:39:00.005+08:00

I can't wait for Christmas! But I don't know where I'll be by then :( Probably on the plane going back to take our luggages..

BIG BIG PIZZZZZA!

I've been the one behind the camera a lot so don't expect to see a lot of me zz.

Finally had the time, so..

Happy belated birthday my darlings! :*)

Love you guys. xoxo.

Earlier this year.

Passport photo*, remember? :D

Later this year.

Such impostors*, too bad En. Rizal didn't do it!

Hope people had fun during their holidays! :)

Miss ya'll.

Status : Still trying to adapt

2010-12-04T13:44:00.006+08:00

The city that never sleeps!

Someone got married on the street :*)

The weather is cold.

Other than that, it's paradise.

Au revoir, mon amour!

2010-11-26T04:06:00.005+08:00

:*)

But no, I'm not going there, yet.

Since I'm leaving VERY soon I wanted to blog about this year.

It's good we're now in a resting state. Maybe being apart isn't a bad thing after all.

Have some speculation or do things you wanna do but hadn't got the chance.

Where as for me, I'm going half a globe away to spend my holidays. My family, can finally be a family again :') That's why I'm gonna do this family-free.

So, it's been one hell of a year, I don't kid. It's really been like one.hell.of.a.year.

All those schoolworks or teachers, fights or misunderstandings, gloomy or bad weather days, they bring me down. But in the end you'll find what made you happy despite all those crap :)

Like..

Cutesy people make me happy, all.the.time.

I can never live a day without thinking about their face.

My stupid weakness is I.can't.fucking.stand.very.cute.people.

Like, NEVER.

Random #delightful times with friends.

Chinese New Year Holidays

The Four & Waiyen darling :*)

Baby Jas.

Four years best friends.

Angels Children's Home

Any idea where is this? :)

My lovely ladies.

Quince's Birthday

Sports Day, and before

My lovely woman, little Rouyi :*)

And the Justin Bieber craze goes on.

Sleepover at Alyssa's

With awesome Xiangqi & Jiaen.

Freaking laughed for 15 minutes non-stop.

Fell down, teared.

OXY JOYOUS MOMENT :')

Volunteering for The Pink Ribbon Ball

The half sister, for 8 long years

Enalysoo.

Adam Lambert's Concert

BEST CONCERT EVER.

Simply one of the happiest day of my entire life.

Met new friends :*)

'10 Graduates

Lovely E-jia.

Pretty pretty Janey.

Bunny! Meikuan.

Another spectacular Friday

/hehe :*)

Scxy!

Dinner at Serdang

Xin-ning.

My darling.

The Mines ftw.

Cousin's visit back to M'sia

:'D

Meiyin's birthday

It's sweet, not disgusting :')

Peksee's Birthday

Me, Sean, David & Mymy

Watching "Pants on the ground"!

Juann's birthday

I only put this picture because it was still daylight and I don't look tired :)

My belated birthday

The moment I see her the tears rolled out automatically.

Kiu Wong :*)

Jiaen's birthday

Chak Soon's wide smile omg. :D

Holidays

Don't you just love'em?

:*)

My very last LM days.

Inter Bahagian

xoxo.

Gathering '10

whythefuck.do.i.look.so.skinny. FTW.

Sookmin, Sarah at the middle acting all cool but no :)

My dearest & emcee of the day Sookmin.

What happened that time brought me down, but I know I confronted it well.

Zuxing, Carlyne, Waiyen.

My sticker! :*)

Believe it or not this was a candid.

I know we look sdf cool :D

Heeee :)

The day, and the day before.

After party at Pyramid.

Lol at Sarah and Sawyin.

I know you don't see me cause I'm on the right row leaning back ;p

Most importanly, #schooldays.

As long as the wrong feels right.

Rainbow, Molly the Painter! :D

Art Classes (more like picnic periods)

I remember :)

"They call me Pimpo, they call me Plez.

They call me Yann How, that's not my name. That's not my name."

HAHA! :D

Very random times

Tinweiwei's paper bag cut my neck.

Figure it out! :)

BROMANCE.

Daniel Ibanez Suarez Flores Lau Jin Ming.

That's his full name.

"I bomb youh country!" *Philipine accent*

Each time I take a picture with Kendrick,

he never once failed to make me look stupid :(

Traditional Costume Competition

Ah! Baby & Weici.

Darl/Fling.

QAME. Wait I mean, EAQM.

The arrival of Japanese exchange students

Elaine, Tsubasa Baba, me, Miyi.

He didn't eat out toufu kay.

YUKA!!

I was standing beside her :*)

I told you I can't stand cute people. In a good way.

The QAME.

I don't care if we're not on the different frequency, we are still one in my heart.

Quincey quince!

For crying out loud, we're like 16 already.

EminYi.

Top : Hauwei & Shukae

Down : Miyi & Alyssa

Such a coincidence they pose the same!

LUNG MING HONG.

My guy best friend. He is like just another cute kid.

Look at him. Me wannabe.

Thank you Alyssa!

Look at that banana.

SEE!!

Our hair up together.

Siyee.

Everybody UNO-ing while I'm outside posing :D

MEOW!

MEOW MEOW!

Freaking love this picture.

"Wah my watch look so nice. Yer can see my pimple. Take again!"

Miyi :"I see a lot of space for me to squeeze my head in!!"

Alyssa:"Cannot see my pimple right?"

LOL.

11.11

Guantatt's birthday.

Last picture in school.

I've dug as much memories as I can, I guess that's it.

Aik, I'm gonna be away for a month. I'm gonna miss a lot of people :'(

Rouyi, Weiwei, Changchang, Lingling, Shukae and other form5's all the best in SPM!

Kiuwong, please stay strong. I'm there if you need me. No.matter.what.
Princesskoh, I will definitely cry on Christmas, because I'm not with you.
Darl & Sookmin, you wonderful people should miss me! BFF.
A & M, Losers don't deserve your love and I'll miss you. Skype.
Lililpz, concentrate working stop looking at guys and miss me!
Minghong, I know you read also won't read until this part but, I'll miss you.
Haoroong, thank you for existing. You always matter.

Erm I guess that's the people who will actually come across this blog. :)

So bye.

The one fact I ALWAYS know,

'Forgive me' is always better than 'I'm sorry'.

CHAO OUTSIDE MTFK! ZE PETHER CHAO SRANG.

I mean, the Peter Chao slang :)

Like OMG.

2010-11-24T02:46:00.010+08:00

It's 3.25am. I can't go to bed again.

I really wanna talk about what happened earlier.

I hope you get my story. Best friends huh =__=

Shocking heartbreak twice tonight. Within 25 minutes.

Phone call #1

*RING RING RING*

"Hello? Hello? HELLO?!"

*RING RING RING*

"HELLO! Hello? Helloooooooo?"

*Calls back*

"The number you have dialed..."

*RING RING RING*

"Hello!!!!"

"*sobbing and crying, having a hard time to talk* E.. *sniff* min... *sniff&cough*"

"Why the hell are you crying T_T"

"*still crying* Are... you... free... now..."

HEART DROPPED.

Phone call #2

"Hey."

"HEY! So free call me? What's up?"

"Nothing, just wanna talk to you."

"Yeah right, there must be something if you call me."

"No, really. Just wanna talk."

"SPIT IT OUT."

"*cries out recklessly*"

HEART DROPPED. AGAIN.

LUCKILY FLING WAS WITH ME THANK ILY.

I wanted to kill myself.

You know, I never knew it was this painful and hard hearing people cry by your ear. Through your ears you hear them cry, you feel their tears flowing down their cheeks. So much sorrow. And knowing you are not beside them, hurts.

I must never do that to anyone, ever. It hurts so bad.

Well best friends, I can't make your decisions, just think positively okay? But not too much of the thinking, not healthy :)

On the other hand, I'm glad you called. Because you turned to me instead of them, letting me know you trust me.

With love.

2010-11-21T19:00:00.003+08:00

BOOM.

:')

Went to Amcorp the other day and FINALLY, found:-

HEEHEEHAHAHOHO :D

AND THIS!! SDF SPEECHLESS.

MEGAN BABY YOU SO HAWTTTT :')

Kiu Wong, I miss you :(

zzz

zzzz

loveyou.

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, since I'm leaving VERY soon.

I've decided to create a post about this year :)

But, not this one. Heehee.

I WILL BE BACK.

Getting near to Christmas!

2010-11-09T23:49:00.007+08:00

I went to I-City the other day. Such a last minute decision and I have no camera with me :(

What a disaster! To be honest I've never heard of the name but I know the existence of this place and it turns out to be much much more pretty than I expected it to be.

We went to the "cold room" and there was like a photo gallery and I purposely memorised the photographers name so I can find that photo lol.

(pictures found from Google)

Well... It looked a lot better in the gallery..

HAHA! Found this.

Thennnnnnnnnnn, I bought a Hello Kitty light! :D

Planned to buy the head band but then it's hello kitty! And I won't get to wear a head band with lights that often right.

Hello Kitty with Elmo tee! (it rhymes :D)

White! Can change colour one kai wan xiao!

Blueeee. (Xiaoxue's current braces colour :P)

Red.

**************

Sometimes I can't believe I got such cute cute birthday presents.

Okay although it's like half a month ago I received Sookmin's yesterday and Weici's today. They are so efficient :) Sarcasm.

One corner of my room is occupied with my presents :)

I cleaned my room today and have a look at them again, which made me smile again.

Sooooooo cuuuuuuute! :) Serena's art work :D

Left to right : Nic, Rouyi, Weiwei, Serena, Shukae! ♥

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ :*)

A whole paper bag full of Hello Kitty stuff! :D

Files, stickers, a mug, cards and moree!

Thank you Fling ♥ :*)

Heeheeeeee! Sookmin! :D

Why are you so funny? ♥ :*)

Chang! ♥

a.k.a. Serena gave me this on their Graduation day :*)

Kiu Wong, ♥'s

Can't imagine what it's like without you! :*)

Scxy. ♥

There's no need to say.

Oh goodness. When will I ever stop loving you ♥ :*)

************

Skype :

Facebook :

I have no idea why people even liked this :*)

Quite touched though, probably because they agree with me :P

Not suppose to end like this :(

2010-11-05T01:40:00.005+08:00

I remember clearly I can barely smile properly with my eyes open.

I feel so empty these few days.

I won't stop reminding myself some part of me are gone just like that.

It was horrible to see people cry, all those sobbing and tears. It's so heartbreaking to see. And to be part of it I feel so so so so down. I think about it so much I get tired so easily and I had to sleep early at night. But tonight. I kind of starting to not think about it. I don't feel tired at all.

I know I won't be able to control myself most of the time unlike tonight.

But I'll try to get over it. At least, that's what I say and try to do to myself now.

I will, always, miss you guys. Period.

xo.

Wait, why is everybody acting so recklessly these days? Including yx D:

I should've listened.

2010-10-27T23:29:00.006+08:00

I TALKED TO YIXIAN :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

SO DAMN FREAKING C.U.T.E :')

She's my sunshine!

I'd catch a grenade for ya :)